Intake, Output and Blessings

Mom is continuing to sleep more and eat little, but the thing that has me most worried right now is that she is not going to the bathroom very much. She is not having regular bowel movements and she has always been quite regular. She is taking stool softeners every day, as well as senna, to help with movements, but she has not yet regulated. The nurse indicated that as intake of both food and water drop, bowel movements can becomes less, but she also said that becoming more sedentary is even more a factor in her lack of regular bowel movements.

Even more worrisome to me is the fact that she is also not urinating more than two or three times in a 24 hour period, although she is drinking one to two 16 oz glasses most days. In that she has diabetes that can become serious. I believe renal failure is always a worry with diabetes, as her Doctor regularly tracked her creatinine levels, which are a measure of kidney function. I am at the juncture where I have to decide if I try to force her to drink more and eat more, or if I accept that her body is deciding for itself what it wants and I need to give her peace and comfort in which to let it do its thing. I don’t want to give up on her and just let her slip away, but I also don’t want to torment her in the last few months of her life. Everyone has their opinion of what the right thing to do would be, but I suspect, in the long run, Mom will decide for herself… as she has always done.

On a happier note, in late October we adopted a rescue dog, a 3 and a half year old Doberman. She came to us with a sweet face and a gentle nature, but she was obviously a bit nervous about her new life and what it would mean to her. In the ensuing 2.5 months she has come to trust us and we have come to love her dearly.

She’s a natural service dog. When mom is sitting in her chair the dog will go to her and just lay her head on the arm of mom’s chair and let mom pet her. When I put mom to bed at night, the dog will often stay in the room, in her bed next to ours, and sleep with mom to keep her company. Whenever I get a bit stressed out or feel like I’m on the ragged edge, before I even realize that it’s happened, she has her head under my hand and her body pressed against mine. Once, when I was very frustrated with the way things were going and let my tone get just a bit too sharp, she raised her head and yipped at me from where she was lying at the bedroom door. I didn’t get it at first, but after the second time I spoke with that tone in my voice and she yipped again, I got it… I took a breath and tried speaking in a more relaxed voice. She lay her head back down and closed her eyes. I’m learning to listen to her when she tells me something.

I must admit that, on more than one occasion, I have said that it was Grace that brought her into our lives and I still believe that. She has been a source of laughter for mom, who delights in watching her play with her toys or wrestle with me on the floor, she’s company for me and she’s a delight for all who have met her. I cannot emphasize enough what a blessing it has been to have her with us at this time when things can so easily go sideways. She’s the calm and always loving heart that keeps us all grounded…  and scratching her ears! She has truly become an invaluable part of our caregiving team.